Easing a Heartbreak

What’s TGIF for most people is TGIT where I am. Thursday = night out. But with neither a partner nor friend willing to give up weekend partying to console somebody with loose screws, I guess I’m stuck with myself.

So what’s a dutiful wife to do when you learn that the husband who vowed that you would be the only woman in his life suddenly marries someone else?

Jump off Burj Khalifa? Tasteful, but how would I get the ticket to the observation deck when I still don’t have a job?  Getting the appointment might take forever too and I don’t have the luxury of time. Visa issues, ‘nuf said.

How about holding my breath underwater until I pass out? That could work. After all, the beach is a mere 20-minute walk away. But the purplish, bloated appearance I’d get once they scoop me out the water might not look good in the photos. When your husband trades you off for someone else, you’re entitled to be vain.

Self destruct. Now that’s the typical thing to do, right? Get drunk, smoke till your lungs collapse. I just realized I have never sipped any alcoholic drink since I met my frog prince. Before him I would get intoxicated until the wee hours of the night then go straight to work with my head spinning in circles. Ahh, those were the good times. Darn, I miss beer. If not for the alcohol ban here (and my limited finances), I would probably be on a drinking spree by now.

What if I just get even? Give him an eye for an eye. Typical. But not my cup of tea. Eeeewww, just the thought of it is giving me the shivers. I can’t even conceive of having a roll in the hay with somebody I do not love just so I could avenge myself. That would be low. No offense.

Work, work, work! Now ‘yer talkin’. This would just be the thing for me! Errrr, one tiny glitch – I don’t have a job.

Poison? Hard to swallow. Pills? Pricey. Slashing? Juvenile. A noose? Morbid.

It’s difficult to get over a break up. But seeing the beginning of the end is ten times harder. It’s that stage when you feel like everything is slipping away and there’s nothing you can do about it. It’s like waiting for your execution after a death sentence.  When your world is about to fall apart you realize that there’s nothing much you can save but yourself. Slowly, you have to learn to let go of everything. The words that he said, the promises he made, the memories you shared…down the gurgler. This battle is no longer worth the fight. I have already lost.

Thankfully, I have a few friends in whose words I find comfort. If not for encouraging messages they tirelessly send when I’m having my now-becoming-usual “I can’t do this” episodes, I would have been run over by one of the metro trains by this time.

To Pan’s best friend and Sis F for helping me keep my sanity these days, and Lyka (who, by the way, doesn’t know what’s going on but keeps her door open when I need a friendly chat until 3am) you might not be able to read this but THANK YOU….


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